Short Break

Sorry for a lack of activity the last few days. I have neglected the blog out of busyness, and then I thought, "You know what? I need to not blog next week while I go on vacation." So that's what I am going to do. For the next 7 days you won't see anything going on on here, but if you are all good little boys and girls I will have a special treat prepared for you all on Black Friday. Deal?

Peace out, and a Happy Thanksgiving to you all!

No Shave November Games

 

I like to start off with a little incentive challenge for the main game. If yourself, or a willing volunteer, have a beard then print these off. Give one to each student so they can submit a design or style they would like to see an adult leaders facial hair shaved into. Pick the best one for each gender, and as an additional reward they will get to play the lead role for the main challenge.



In the main game you will need a "shaver" for each gender (which should be the winners of the style contest) and three volunteers from each gender to be the "shavies". Have each team line up their "shavies" in a row of chairs and have an adult volunteer with a can of Barbasol put a nice coat of shaving cream on their faces (makes sure they get the neck, chin, cheeks, and area above the lip). The "shaver" will then be given a popsicle stick (or if you can trust them to use the back side of a plastic knife that is fine too) and will need to cleanly shave all three members of their team. I suggest having a volunteer or yourself stand nearby to judge whether a shave is acceptable or if they have to go back and do some work before moving on to the next "shavie". The shaver to get finished with all three first wins and gets their design shaved into your face.

If you choose to trim up during youth group so that all the kids can see the aftermath then play this final game which will involve a can of shaving cream for each team and a large easy to clean surface (i.e. a tarp or plastic folding table). You tell each team that you will be playing a "pictionary" type game where they will be taking turns drawing in shaving cream and will need to make a nice smooth blanket/canvas space on their table/tarp/whatever. Each round will start with one person from each gender going up to a volunteer leader to hear them say a word. After that word is said they are to run back to their group and start drawing in the shaving cream (kind of like Jesus drawing in the dirt). The first team to get the picture right gets a point, first team to 10 points wins. You can make any kind of theme for this game: Thanksgiving words, famous people with beards, or none at all. Whatever you do the kids will have fun.

So there you have it. I hope you enjoy the graphic and games. See you tomorrow!

The Logos and Legos

Your senior pastor uses Bible Gateway, and the worship pastor uses YouVersion, but what is the Bible website of choice for youth ministers? Well I tell you what it should be: The Brick Testament!

For those of you who don't know, the Brick Testament chronicles most of the Old Testament and part of the New in Legos. From the creation of world to the end of it, you can see it all in colorful blocks of illustrative magic.

I seriously love using this site. The work alone makes it amazing, but the fact that it is easy to navigate the different stories and they are documented for content makes it a great resource. I love putting together power points or videos of all the pictures (there is one for nearly every verse) as a tool to share particular stories with our youth. It always keeps their attention during the lesson, and usually gets a good laugh.

I mentioned above that they document content. Since many of the Bible's Old Testament stories aren't rated PG you see a lot of the Lego equivalent of blood and some depiction of sexual sin. This is reassuring at least to know they aren't doctoring the text, but it should serve as a warning to maybe use discretion with 6th and 7th grade students.

So there you have it! I hope you are encouraged to use this website in the development of future devotions, or it least to visit it and let it bring some joy to your day.

Until next week, God bless.

Strange Youth Pastor Facts

Today we bring you the strange and exciting of the world of youth ministry. Behold the amazing feats of legendary youth workers, wonder at these almost superhero like accounts of intriguing individuals, and recoil at some of the more shocking stunts in student ministry history!

- At a 2007 summer camp eight Oklahoma youth pastors executed the largest recorded water balloon massacre by preparing hundreds of water bombs in secret and then leading all the boys in camp out for a "special devotion". The students never saw it coming.

- Scott Manning of Forkbend Church of God once ate four boxes of Twinkies in one sitting. When asked for a comment he quoted Philippians 4:13 saying, "I can do all things through him who gives me strength."

- Cory Whiteside of Bossier City, LA has served for three years as Director of Student Ministries at NorthPointe Church and has yet to get a "speaking to" from the Church Elders.

- Steve Carman holds the record for the shortest period of employment as an on staff youth pastor. He was officially voted on by the congregation and was in the middle of his drive across the state to relocate for this new position when he got a call from the Senior Pastor informing him they would not be able to pay him because the church needed a new roof.

- Ken Thompson of Casper, WY holds the record for most consecutive donuts in a church van. What is even more noteworthy is that of all the students present with smart phones none uploaded a video of the incident to Facebook.

- Missy Wolf of Lake City, OH once organized at See You at the Pole Rally and got free pizzas donated by not just one, but three different restaurants in town.

- Bob Wise, a part time youth worker in Kentucky, actually managed to use vacation time from his full time job to go on a trip with his family.

And there you have it, just a few of the bizarre, amazing, and most likely fabricated stories of youth ministry legends.

Just One More Political Post

It's funny for me to look at that title, because in reality, I haven't written anything about voting or this years election at all. It's actually for you, who have undoubtedly seen more than you wanted to online in the last few months (especially late yesterday and this morning).

Last night my wife stayed up late visiting with a friend and around 11:00 we just started seeing a flood of angry posts on Facebook. Amongst them where verbal accusations about both pundits and disappointment with other "Americans". I didn't see much of this after the last election because four years ago Facebook barely had anyone on it that wasn't "college aged", but now with users being extremely varied in ages, the whole atmosphere has become a dodge ball free for all of opinions, especially negative ones.... and most where from Christians.

How was it that 9 out of 10 status' of believers I knew were not only about the election, but where negative in attitude? How did we get suckered into loosing all sense of the gospel we are supposed to be witnesses to?

Thank the LORD that some more sensible things started showing up this morning, like this...

"For anyone upset that I'm not taking the election more seriously, I am profoundly grateful for the rights and liberties we have as American citizens. When it comes to who our President is, I will pray for the man and for those who lead alongside him. But I refuse to put my hope in ANYONE other than Jesus Christ."

That brings me to my encouragement for you today. If you are fed up with what is going on online, go be a light! If you are fed up with how the election turned out, that's fine, but remember your duty as a Christian...

1 Timothy 2:1-3
"I urge, then, first of all, that petitions, prayers, intercession and thanksgiving be made for all people— for kings and all those in authority, that we may live peaceful and quiet lives in all godliness and holiness. This is good, and pleases God our Savior..."

See you tomorrow light bearers!

More of the Tommy Chronicals!

You pull up on a house that looks a little too clean. While the whole subdivision is relatively new, this one reminds you of a Thomas Kinkade painting. You don't even have to check the address to know this is the place. Just about the moment you are deciding if you need to go ring the bell or just honk the horn Tommy pops his head out the door as if he has been waiting on you for the last 10 minutes. He starts jogging to the car and then sprints back to the house. After about a minute he comes back out with a coat and gets into the car...

YOUTH PASTOR: Hey Tommy! Hows it going?

TOMMY: Hey, good!

YOUTH PASTOR: You ready to go?

TOMMY: Yeah...wait! I have to go lock the front door.

Tommy gets out of the car and runs to the porch, once the door is locked however he casually strolls back to the car.

YOUTH PASTOR: Everything good now?

TOMMY: Yeah, I think so. We can go.

YOUTH PASTOR: So are you excited for your friend Billy to come to youth group tonight?

TOMMY: Yeah! I was telling him all about it this afternoon while we were playing Modern Warcraft online today.

YOUTH PASTOR: Well that's great. Do you think he is going to like it?

TOMMY: Yeah, I think so, he is really excited to try out the whip cream pie game we did.

YOUTH PASTOR: You know that we don't play the same games every week right?

TOMMY: You don't?

YOUTH PASTOR: No.

TOMMY: But you guys play games every week right?

YOUTH PASTOR: Oh yeah!

TOMMY: Oh man! I forgot my mom's cookies!

YOUTH PASTOR: You mean the sugar free raisin cookies?

TOMMY: Yeah.

YOUTH PASTOR: That's OK. I picked up some other snacks...so we should be good.

TOMMY: Oh, OK.

YOUTH PASTOR: So your mom says that Billy lives just down this road. Do you know where to turn?

TOMMY: Ummm...sorta.

YOUTH PASTOR: What do you mean "sorta"?

TOMMY: Well I know that it's off this road after a sign.

YOUTH PASTOR: Well what does that sign say?

TOMMY: It says something about "guns save lives"...Oh there it is!

You slam on your breaks in order to turn down a road that you were just about to cross.

YOUTH PASTOR: OK, well now that we are on this road do we just keep following it?

TOMMY: Yeah.

YOUTH PASTOR: How far?

TOMMY: I dunno.

Will they find Billy's house? Will Tommy live to see it? Tune in next time for the continued Chronicles of Tommy: Everyone's Favorite Homeschooled Student!

Free Game and Grapic

Here is a game we created for and perfected through our on campus club that meets before school at our local junior high. It works for generally any size group, and the best part is that it can be played just about anywhere that has chairs....

 

In the game "Use Your Head" you give each student a penny and tell them to make a circle of inward facing chairs (basically the opposite of how you would for musical chairs). You then tell the kids to put the penny on top of their head and sit down. Through out the game they will be given  "simple"  math problems and a direction. For example you may say, "Take the square root of nine and go that many chairs to the left" or "Multiply three by seven, subtract fifteen, and go that many right". Now there are two ways that people can get out in this game. The first is if they are the last one to be seated. The second is if they drop their coin in the hustle and bustle of trying to quickly get around the circle. The game ends in a show down of wits with the last two standing.

 

Note: It helps to have your math problems worked out beforehand.



I'm not feelling well...

I definitely have some kind of stomach bug. We will just say that I feel like paraphrasing the old proverb about the dog and it's vomit...

As a sick man returns to his toilet,
so a fool returns to his folly
- Proverbs 26:11 (The Dehydrated Youth Pastor Version)

See you all on Monday.

My Take on the Disney/Star Wars Merger

 

 

So by now everyone has heard about Disney's $4 Billion purchase of the Lucasfilm empire, and the impending release of a new Star Wars film in 2015. Plenty of jokes like, "I heard millions of nerd voices suddenly cry out in terror and then were suddenly silenced" riddled the Internet, but after letting the news settle for a bit I have a different take then most my age.

 

Sure, there is no chance that this will be as amazing as the original trilogy, but can it do any more damage than anything else that has already been done? I say no. In fact I say that the latest trilogy wasn't even bad enough to make the experience un-enjoyable. And that is what I am looking forward to, the experience.

 

When I was in high school our youth group went to the premieres of Star Wars and Lord of the Rings and we loved it. The only thing since then that was worth going to see was Harry Potter, and you didn't know if you could do that safely without a conservative church member getting on your back. Now with the upcoming Hobbit Trilogy, and in a few years a new Star Wars, hope can return for epic midnight movie premiere events. It will be something to share with a new generation, one who will not be as judgemental as mine, and therefore more susceptible to the joy of it all and in turn the excitement that will be building in our community.

 

To all you nay-sayers I say, "Go ahead and complain", but as for me and my fellow youth workers we will be buying advanced tickets.



R.I.P Santa Claus

Yes, it is Halloween and I am writing about Christmas! Although October 31st is a day that my family looks forward to with anticipation every year, something recently trumped it's hype...the reality of Saint Nick's existence.

Now before I get too far in let me preface this by saying that we have a very intelligent little girl, and last year she almost caught us setting up all the presents downstairs. We knew that it is only a matter of time before she would find out, and better to come from us then some kid on the play ground.

So, my wife had been talking to a Christian friend of hers about how they held Santa Claus as myth in their household from day one with their children, but clearly taught them that there was a Christ loving individual who really did give individuals gifts in secret and that we can still practice that spirit around the celebration of Christ's birth. We were totally on board with raising our new born in this mindset, but how would we bring our seven year old to this untimely fact?

It happened on a car ride (which I was not part of). There was a story, some tears, questions, more tears. Finally there were signs of  a breakthrough in understanding, then she said to her mother, "So Santa is in Heaven, and it's his spirit that delivers all those gifts!" More emotion filled talk was had, and while I didn't ask for all the details I assumed that she finally understood the matter because one of the first things she said to me when I got home from work was, "I know it's you who eats all the cookies and milk."

A week later things seem pretty good, until last night when she asked me, "Daddy, do you think I will get a prize the next time I stick something under my pillow for the Tooth Fairy..."

What interesting stories do you all have from your kids learning the truth about stuff?

Tommy's Mommy

And now the "Chronicles of Tommy" continue, but this time new character emerges...

A woman knocks on your office door. Her wardrobe looks like something your grandmother would wear, but see looks half the age.

CAROL: Hello?

YOUTH PASTOR: Hello there! Can I help you?

CAROL: Yes, my name is Carol. I am Tommy's mom.

YOUTH PASTOR: Oh, well hello! Nice to meet you. I was wondering if he was going to be popping his head in any time soon. He usually comes with you to the Women's Bible Study on Tuesday mornings, right?

CAROL: Oh, why yes he does! But today the The Union for Schooling in the Home (TUSH) was having a field trip to the textile factory and I knew he just wouldn't want to miss that for the world!

YOUTH PASTOR: Sounds exciting.

CAROL: Oh, it is, and the kids enjoy going every year. But I just wanted to check with you on something real quick. Tommy just had a wonderful time at youth group last week, he talked all the way home about the games you played, about all the other kids that where there, and how he wanted to invite his friend Billy.

YOUTH PASTOR: Oh yes, Billy. Tommy had mentioned him to me before.

CAROL: Yes, and I just wasn't sure if the kids were allowed to invite friends or not whose families weren't church members.

YOUTH PASTOR: Of course they are. We want the kids to invite all of their friends.

CAROL: Oh that's wonderful to hear. Because this boy needs to be saved in the worst way. His daddy died when he was real young, and his momma remarried to some Mormon farmer, thank the Lord he doesn't actually practice, but I tell you that Satan is in that house. They just let Billy watch all sorts of garbage on TV, and last week I went over there to pick him up for a sleep over at our place and he was playing with fireworks unattended....I tell you it's bad.

YOUTH PASTOR: A-ha, I understand. Tommy said something about Billy living on a farm and that he couldn't go to church, but now things make sense

CAROL: Yes, the poor thing is just in need of Jesus so bad, and we figure if he would just come then you may be able to reach out to him.

YOUTH PASTOR: Well, you...

CAROL: But the problem is that next week I have to take my husband Cal...You know Cal don't you? The Chair of the Deacon's Board?

YOUTH PASTOR: Oh yes...we have...met a time or two.

CAROL: Well I have to take him up to the city hospital tomorrow afternoon to see his hemorrhoids specialist, and we won't be back until late, so I was wondering if there was any way that you could give Tommy a ride and then he could show you how to get to Billy's so that he could come with him?

You wince a little as the words come out

YOUTH PASTOR: Well, um...I guess we could do that. I would just need to plan for it, but I don't see why not.

CAROL: Oh that's wonderful! Thank you so much. The boys will just be so thrilled. I will let them know, and then I will send some snacks with them for the group. Would you like anything in particular?

YOUTH PASTOR: Well that's thoughtful. Anything you would like is welcome by me.

CAROL: Well then I will just make up a batch of my sugar free raisin cookies!

YOUTH PASTOR: Sounds...nutritious.

CAROL: You know, they are, but I just make them so Tommy has something to snack on in the afternoons and not get all wound up. You know he is the worst when he gets into sweets.

YOUTH PASTOR: Yeah, we found that out after our "Whipped Cream Pie Eating Contest" game last week...

CAROL: Well listen, I need to run, and I am sure you have to get back to whatever it is that you do. Thanks again!

YOUTH PASTOR: No problem, see you next week!

Hear Carol head out church door into parking lot.

YOUTH PASTOR: "Whatever it is that you do"?

FREE Three Part Hunger Games Study

Hey there internet savy youth workers! Here is the Monday Give Away! It is a three week lesson guide you can use with the movie "The Hunger Games". It covers a plethora of different social issues like obeying authority, murder, and euthenasia. It should generate some good discussions in your groups. Enjoy!

Ode to the Part Timmers

To all who have had to balance school or a job that pays the bills while ministering to teens.
For those who spend their breaks at work checking kids Facebook status'.
The ones who use their vacation time to take the group on a trip.
Don't let anyone say that you aren't doing ministry full time, because its where your heart and mind is all the time!

To all who wish they had an office space inside their church building.
For those who got the unlimited texting package even though they aren't getting reimbursed for it.
The ones who stay up late at home to finish a lesson,
You are just important as the rest of us!

To all who go back in on Monday after driving the group back from the weekend conference,
For those who don't get to go to coffee with the other area youth pastors during the week.
The ones who pull an eight  hour day pushing paper only to go home and find their inbox contains an an angry email that needs answering.
We salute you!

Your deserve more credit for what you do. Hang in there brothers and sisters, and keep up the great work!

The Return of Tommy (Part 2)

If you haven't gotten the pleasure of reading our first encounter with Tommy meet him here, and then read the first part of today's ongoing conversation here.

TOMMY: So yeah, I want to come but my mom said I should ask you if I need to bring anything.

YOUTH PASTOR: Uhh...umm...well we encourage all students to bring a Bible with them for our study time, and you probably want to wear tennis shoes instead of flip flops when we do active games.

TOMMY: I can do that. I have my bible from AWANAs's and I never wear flip flops anyways, may mom says my feat smell so bad that if i want to wear my Birkenstocks I have to wear them with socks and then I have to leave my sneakers out in the garage.

YOUTH PASTOR: Hmm...well that's nothing to be ashamed of.

TOMMY: Well I don't know what my mom is talking about, but really I think if you want to know who has got smelly feet, it's Billy.

YOUTH PASTOR: So who is Billy? Does his family go to church here too?

TOMMY:No, he is my friend from scouts. His family doesn't go to church. I think it's because they live out of town on a farm. But my mom says I should invite him to youth group because it would be good for him.

YOUTH PASTOR: (a little bewildered by previous statement) So...this farm, is it really far away or something?

TOMMY: No, its just like 10 minutes down the road from our house.

YOUTH PASTOR: Then why...you know what, I will just ask your mom later when she drops you off for youth group this week.

TOMMY: (poking through all of the items on your shelf and stuffing more candy in his mouth) So what are you doing here today?

YOUTH PASTOR: Well I am here everyday usually.

TOMMY: Really! Like you work here?

YOUTH PASTOR: Yeah? Why, did you think I did something else?
TOMMY: Well I was up here on Monday with my mom dropping off some stuff for the Women's Group Rummage Sale and I looked around for you and you weren't here, so I thought you must have a real job somewhere.

YOUTH PASTOR: ...

TOMMY: OH, GUESS WHAT! I just got the demo for Modern Warcraft 5: Mercenaries of Madness!

YOUTH PASTOR: Oh, you know what Tommy? I have to finish up my lesson for tomorrow night before a meeting I have to go to here in a little bit. How about you tell me about that another time...


Stay tuned next week for my adventures with Tommy!

The Return of Tommy

A student walks into your office in the middle of the day. It's your "favorite" home school teenager, Tommy...

TOMMY: Hey!

YOUTH PASTOR: Oh, hey Tommy. How's it going?

TOMMY: Oh pretty good, just up here with mom again for her ladies Bible Study.

YOUTH PASTOR: Well that's cool. What...

TOMMY: OOH! Is that bowl of candy free?

YOUTH PASTOR: Well not the whole thing...

(Tommy grabs hand full)

YOUTH PASTOR: but you are welcome to some if you like.

TOMMY: (shoveling two fun sized Snickers in his mouth) This is so great, my mom never lets me have this much candy. She says it gets me all wound up.

YOUTH PASTOR: Well maybe you should save some for later then.

TOMMY: Good idea! (shoves another hand full in his pocket)

YOUTH PASTOR: So...yeah...what have you been doing lately?

TOMMY: Oh! That reminds me! I came in here to tell you I have good news. I'm going to start coming to your youth group.

YOUTH PASTOR: Well that's great, but I thought you had scouts.

TOMMY: Well, we did have it, but then at our camp out last month our scout master's tent got set on fire when Billy was trying to roast marshmallows, and he tried to blame it on me because I was on "fire bucket" duty, but I had already used the water to put out the dead raccoon that we threw in the fire because it really started to smell when it burned, and when we got home my mom said he was quitting because he had a nervous break down or something. But like I said, now I am going to come to your youth group and next week I may bring Billy.

YOUTH PASTOR: ....

A Prayer Request for Strength and More

Although I have covered some ministry "blahs" in the last few weeks on this blog, I must admit that I am not currently dealing with the aftermath of loosing my job, a church leader on my back, or a letter from a concerned parent (but I haven't checked my inbox yet, so we will have to wait and see).

What I am dealing with right now is some financial worries. Worries that I know can be cared for by God. Daily I am praying for discernment and God's peace in this situation, as well as the money that we need. And when I am praying for this I feel I am asking in the right way, like Agur did in Proverbs 30:7-9 by asking “give me neither poverty nor riches, but give me only my daily bread. Otherwise, I may have too much and disown you and say, ‘Who is the Lord?’ Or I may become poor and steal, and so dishonor the name of my God." I want to maintain my faith in allowing God to provide, and I never want to forget Him. I know this prayer is where my heart needs to be, but it is still hard.

As the Bible says, "The prayer of a righteous person is powerful and effective" (James 5:16).Today I reach out to all of you asking for prayer because as youth workers you know what its like to be under financial burdens. I ask for a double portion of the peace of God's Spirit for my family, discernment on what avenues to pursue in seeking help, and of course for the miraculous work that only God can do to provide all the things (including money) that my family needs right now.

As I count my blessings I remember that I have one of the best jobs in the world, and that is partly because of my"co-workers" who can truly be supportive in these struggles. Please keep my family in your prayers, we need them.

Thanks for reading, and looking forward to some lighter content for you tomorrow!

"No Shave November" is Coming!

Hey everyone, the holidays are practically upon us. Between Halloween and Thanksgiving is one of the biggest celebrations for beards. Of course I am talking about No-Shave November. It can be a great way to stimulate fellowship between boys in your small group bible studies, but can also be seen as a fundraising opportunity (one of the more creative ones I have seen is a change jar competition that lets kids vote on what kind of design you will shave your beard into at the end of the month). Whatever you decide to do to celebrate this most glorious of months, use these images to spread awareness...

The Evil Ex (Part 2)

So yesterday I likened losing a church ministry position to a bad breakup, which I honestly don't think was inaccurate. As my day went on I realized that there was another key similarity that I didn't expound upon, and that is our duty as believers to have a Christ-like response.

We have all heard about horrible break up stories where someone did something awful to someone else. I got a really good deal on my first car because the guy who was selling it had a wife (or now ex-wife) who got rather angry with him and took a baseball bat to the front of his car and a pair of keys to the passenger side.

Probably the worst break up in history is that of Samson and his unnamed Philistine wife (Judges 14 and 15), in which after stomping out the bride is given to someone else and when Samson finds out he commits a little arson…and before you know it a ton of people are dead.

Now I don’t think it would ever come to something like that with one of us, but people get ugly sometimes and retaliation isn’t uncommon. You may throw peoples stuff in the trash, tells secrets, belittle others, join the other church of the same denomination on the other side of town…the list could go on forever, and it is very tempting to do something like this to those who have hurt us. However we must remember that Christ modeled that it is possible to show forgiveness. He still died for people as they were doing wrong (Romans 5:8), and when he was mistreated he entrusted God to take care of things instead of himself (1 Peter 2:23). I think if he acted this way with death at the stakes then we can do the same when it’s just our job.

I can’t even begin to tell you how ugly it was when I had to make the decision to leave the church I was serving. My family was mistreated, threats were made if I didn’t comply to the other party’s wishes, and I was left emotionally abused. The worst part is that to this day I am still positive that I did nothing wrong, and in the process of everything I tried to do so.

When people raised their voices at me and spread rumors, I remained like Christ before Pontius Pilate and kept my mouth shut before accusers. When I started closing up shop I didn’t just cut and run, I left copies of all the future activities that had been planned and made sure the youth account ledger was in good order. Instead of pilfering items, that I worked hard to acquire, I left them in the churches ownership. And when I was getting the last of my stuff from the office and a leak started coming in through the ceiling I stuck around and gave a hand.

In the end I can say that I am very happy with how I handled things, and I am sure that The Big Man is too. I hope you can all remember that whether we have a building of believers supporting us or not, we are God’s shepherds and that means consistently modeling His way.

Best of luck to all of you, and God bless!

The Evil Ex

Do you ever realize that loosing a job at a church is a lot like going through a bad break up?

Think about it. One moment you are happy and then out of nowhere every last scrap turns to rubbish. They are always emotionally involved no matter how hard we try to make them not, and both parties have their own version of what went wrong. You change your Facebook profile, and you end up loosing a bunch of friends. When they call, you let it go to voice mail because you know it's just going to be about them wanting to know where their stuff is or telling you when you can come by and pick up your own belongings.

Of course nothing tops the awkwardness of running into each other in public afterwards. You think it's OK to go to your favorite Sunday afternoon restaurant, only to be proven wrong by the panic inducting fear you experience when you see each other, but they do absolutely nothing to acknowledge your presence. That part will change however when they find out that you are "with someone else". Then they will make it known that they think its inappropriate, even though they have moved on.

The good news is that, in time, the wounds will heal if you allow Jesus to do so.

The Bears of Bad News

Ever open up your e-mail and get one of these...

Dear [irresponsible youth pastor],

My child came home from [insert youth activity here] and I was shocked at [the activity my student was forced to participate in/how you handled a certain situation/something you said in front of the students]. You should really consider the consequences of your actions. I'm at a loss for why you would go and do something like this. I believe that an apology to [the student/myself/the congregation/Jesus] is in order.

No matter how awesome you do your job you will get these, and they are usually at the most inopportune times. Besides having the ability to completely emotionally derail you they can also take up a great deal of your time, so here are a few quick tips to hammer out the problem with as little extra drama as possible.

1.) Only read it twice - This is for your benefit and theirs. Most people would tell you not to meddle over the email over and over again, in which I actually agree, but before you respond make sure that you didn't read any details wrong. Nothing will make you look like a bigger idiot than addressing the wrong problem or responding to something that someone didn't even say. After the second read DON'T GO BACK!

2.) Walk away for 15 minutes (that's all) - You need to make sure you don't write a steam filled response, but you also don't want to make the person wait two days. Go take a walk around the church, refill your coffee cup, check your Facebook, or whatever floats your boat as long as you go back to the keyboard less angry than before.

3.) Think honestly, not defensively. - Fess up to the accusation and don't paint a picture that's not true. Admit that the game got out of hand, that a topic went a certain direction, or that you weren't very patient with one of the kids. Share any necessary details that the parent may not have gotten, but don't try to point blame on a particularly rowdy kid or lack of adult volunteers. Of course you should also take caution with your words, but more importantly is that you take responsibility.

4.) Run it by your pastor or volunteers who were present - It's not bad to run your response by a trusted confidant to make sure you are doing the right thing. With using another on-staff church person you know that confidentiality will be kept and they may be able to give you some pointers on where a certain church member may be coming from. If nobody is available to you but you had an adult leader at the event in question you can ask them if you adequately responded to the concern or if there were any details that where left out.

5.) Kill with kindness - To make sure I defuse the bomb as much as possible I always end my response to angry parent emails with a thanks that they brought this to my attention. For extra brownie points I often tell them that I am glad that they have such a great relationship with their child that they can share things with their parent. Of course always make sure you close with an invitation to the parent to contact you with any more questions or concerns.

There you have it. I hope these help you not only resolve your issues with ease but also with speed.

Youth Ministry Memes 3: Deacon Edition

 

Today we pay homage to that most dedicated of parents, and the most saintly of church servants. I am of course talking about the Deacons. But I ask, "Why are they always so angry?"

 

 

Sorry that they are all from the same template, but I hope they give you as much joy as they do me. Feel free to write your own responses in the comment section. See you tomorrow!

FREE Dating Lesson

Hey everyone. Here is this weeks freebie. It is a Power Point lesson on the topic of "Should I date a non-Christian?"

Sorry for the late posting, but I hope you all enjoy it. See you tomorrow!

Love Life Drama

If there is one thing worse than people at your church trying to set you up with someone it is people at your church critiquing someone you are dating.

A few years ago I started seeing a lovely young woman who had been attending our church. She was a single mom with a four year old. Like all of us, she had made some mistakes before she came to know Christ. Nobody had any problems with her before we started to talk, but that all changed when she became a candidate for the youth pastor’s love interest. We began to hear all kinds of complaints like, “She isn’t as spiritually mature as you” and “She only started helping with the youth to get his attention.” When I put my arm around her during church and the phrase “I love you” entered our relationship the response we were getting from some people would have made you think we were having sex before marriage (which happened to be one of the rumors going around). We had one of our own friends come and tell us that they were not on board with the relationship, and half the time we didn’t even know where the complaints were coming from because we were getting them second hand. It hurt both of us. The whole thing annoyed me and sent the message that people didn’t trust my judgment, but to be honest, the real toll was taken on my now wife. She felt attacked and judged, and I know that people have left the church for far less than that.

What’s comforting to know is that we are not alone is this battle, that many ministry couples before us have had to deal with people sticking noses into their romantic life, all the way back to Moses. You may think I’m kidding, but go check it out for yourself in Numbers 12. The story goes that Miriam and Aaron (Moses own brother who is a priest) are talking badly about Moses because of where his wife is from. You could even go as far to say they were judging her for where she had been. Does this sound familiar? Now I will tell you that if you are ever in a similar situation some of the events that occurred in this story probably won’t happen to you (i.e. pillars of cloud and leprous inflictions), but one thing that that Moses did which we must replicate is to not hold their wrongs against them. Not once did Moses go on the offensive, in fact at one point he actually prayed for them.

A tough fact about being in ministry is the “fish bowl” lifestyle: everything you do is on display for others, including how you react to people constantly butting into your business.  An equally difficult fact to live with is that these people need your grace, even when you don’t feel like giving it to them. As a leader you have a great deal of power in your hands, and even when you aren’t thinking about that power you can do a great deal of damage if you fail to keep yourself calm in these highly emotional situations. Some people don’t mean to instigate these problems and if you respond angrily just once to these spiritually fragile people they may feel as if they aren’t welcome in the church any more for their failures, or may even invent divisions and dissentions that weren’t there before, ones that can last lifetimes. The only way for healing to take place, just like the healing Miriam and Aaron needed, is your intercession with forgiveness.

So my advice to you is to protect the one you choose to adore, but keep cool and offer mercy. In the long haul your actions will definitely help you from adding any additional stress to your life, and they may just bring people closer to God as well.

 

All Treat, No Trick!

Hey everyone, sorry for no post yesterday, but we hurriedly went to visit a church member that was admitted to an out of state hospital, and that kind of took out the whole day. To make up for it though I will have something fun for you tomorrow. In the mean time I wanted to fill you all in on a quick, and easy, act of service for your youth group this Halloween.

UNICEF has been doing the collecting change with trick-or-treating thing for over 60 years, and have raised over $167 Million for kids in need of food, immunizations, and education. What I would bet you didn't know was that the whole thing came into being by a pastor's wife who after passing out candy to kids on Halloween said, "It's too bad we can't turn this into something good."

Of course she found a way to do so, and I would challenge you to do the same. You see Halloween falls on a Wednesday this year. We know that kids won't show up that night, so our church is cancelling it's children and teen programs that normally meet on Wednesday evenings. However, while they are out gallivanting in the streets of their neighborhood we are enabling them to turn it into something good. We ordered a FREE package from UNICEF and got two dozen cool looking donation boxes, some posters, and even a 1 Gig jump drive full of other resources to use. What is best is that we got our package in a little over a week.

There is still time for you to advertise this to your kids and receive a package to disperse to your kids. Tell them the story of Trick-or-Treat for UNICEF's beginning, that they should show the love of Christ by taking a young neighborhood kid or sibling trick-or-treating, and that they can aide in helping kids around the world while they do it.

So there you go. I hope you can add this into an upcoming devotion as a challenge or just make it a church wide service opportunity. It's super easy and your kids will have fun with it.

See you all tomorrow!

Jesus Juke'd

Last Sunday night at youth group there were two funny guys who kept interrupting my lesson with random tangents and jokes. It actually went so far that one of the boys girlfriend's asked him to stop talking. I was able to practice a good deal of patience with them but was admitably disappointed with the behavior of my students that night.

Until the end when I was telling the students that at an upcoming bonfire party I would be telling a true story of demon possession. All the kids where inquiring if I was being honest or if this was going to be one of those "joke" stories where they find out at the end I have just been pulling their leg. I told them that I was absolutely serious but they still doubted. Finally I said, "I swear I am not making this up!"

That's when one of the jokesters said, "Doesn't the Bible say something about not swearing. That you should just let your 'yes' be 'yes', and your 'no' be 'no'." And then the other one chimed in that he was pretty sure that the verse was James 5:12 (which ends up being right).

BAM! Jesus Juked!!!

Have you ever heard of this? Christian Blogger Jon Acuff first coined this phrase about two years ago on his Blog "Stuff Christians Like". It is essentially when you say something in a lighthearted manner and then somebody blindsides you with a spiritual rebuke to what you said. I had never personally experienced the humility of one of these before, and I never would have thought it would have been at the hands of a student, but man when it happened my jaw dropped.

Has this ever happened in your youth group? It is such a strange mixture of edification and "aww snap" that they are almost impossible to keep to yourself. Please share!

Neat Newsletters Now!

Do you want a snazzy four page newsletter for your youth ministry but don't have time to create one? What if I told you that it was possible with only two pages of content that you may already have (or at least would benefit you to have ready)? Here are my five easy steps to cranking out a highly effective monthly newsletter in just one afternoon.

1.) You need to get a template. If you have any version of Microsoft Word you can find some dandy ones here for FREE!

2.) Dedicate a page to your monthly curriculum guide. "What's this?" you say? This is a place for you to present parents with a listing of your devos for the month along with a short description, key verses, and even a few questions for them to ask their kids at home. If you don't have anything like this at hand you should really consider doing it because it puts you ahead of the game for lessons, makes you look prepared, and parents just eat it up.

3.) Add in a page about upcoming events (special services, fellowship activities, fundraisers, nights you won't be having youth group, etc.) Give dates, times, and other need to know details. Again, you should have something like this at hand already from your church bulletin that you can copy, paste, and add a little fluff.

4.) Add some teen scene statistics. Parents want to know what kind of trends are circling their students world, so give it to them. You don't have to do any real work on this either. I suggest visiting Home Word Center for Youth and Family's website and look at their weekly "Culture Brief" which gives lots of great top ten lists but also some quick articles that can be quite educational. Take a look here.

5.) Got a page that is not quite full. Add a "Ministry Wish List". Most of those things you need for activities and special games don't have to be brand new, and if somebody from your congregation knew that you were looking for something special, well they might be able to scrounge it up from their basement. In mine I also ask for snack donations, and I always get a couple of takers.

This doesn't have to be all however. There are plenty of things that you can add to your newsletters (volunteer schedules, updates/reviews on past activities, or even words of thanks). If you need an idea of how to piece this together you can see an old example of mine here.

Free Halloween Games

Merry Columbus Day to you! (And Happy Canadian Thanksgiving to my friends up north!) To celebrate this momentous holiday I give you three great (and cheep) games for your group for Halloween. Enjoy!


Costume Musical Chairs
A new spin on an old classic. Simply get a large bag full of used Halloween costumes (usually families have them lying around for you to borrow), and just for fun raid the drama ministries costume closet (even throw in a couple old choir uniforms if you like). Put out a circle of chairs with one less than the number of players you have, and then get some music going (you can use this Spotify playlist of "Halloween" music). When someone looses, instead of being disqualified, they have to blindly pick something out of the bag to wear for the remainder of the game. It makes for quite a fun time, and lots of interesting pictures by the time people have multiple mismatched pieces on.

HalloweeniesI made up this game a couple of years ago, but it is essentially a Halloween version of the classic "I Have Never" game. For who have never played the game you have everyone hold up all their fingers, and for each statement that applies to them they have to put a finger down. When you run out of fingers you are out. As you are playing open up a big bag of candy corn, and give a piece to everyone that doesn't have to put a finger down and give the person who actually wins the game a bigger prize (maybe just the rest of the bag), this way everyone gets to have a treat. Here are the questions...

□Ever had your pumpkin smashed
□Had to take your little sibling trick or treating
□Your parents made you wear your winter coat over your costume
□You own Charlie Brown and the Great Pumpkin
□Bought a super hero costume that looked more like pajamas than the super hero itself
□Ever dressed as a food item
□Had your mom make your costume
□Your house gives out non-name brand candy
□You have been TP/egged on Halloween
□You have ever bobbed for apples
□Your parents still won’t let you carve a pumpkin with a real knife
□You have to stay home on “door duty” instead of go out with your friends
□Have worn an older siblings costume from previous year
□You and a sibling dressed up as the same thing the same year
□You and a friend/sibling have dressed up together as some kind of theme (i.e. – Jack and Jill, Wizard of Oz troop, Thing 1&2 from Cat in the Hat, etc. )
□You have dressed as a clown
□Instead of walking around your neighborhood your parents drive you to all their friends and relatives houses.
□You have dressed as a Disney character
□Instead of using fake blood or costume makeup you used ketchup or a red magic marker
□Made up your costume the day of Halloween
□Gone trick or treating as yourself
□Your parents made you put on those flashing reflectors or tape so you wouldn’t get ran over
□Took a roll of toilet paper and made a “mummy” costume
□Your parents check your candy for razor blades
□Found out you lost part of your candy stash on the way home because of hole in bag
□Parents enforced a rule about how much of your candy you could have each day


Clue
This will be pretty simple to pull off if you can get your hands on the cards from the board game. You can make up your own "Detective Note Pads" if you like, but after doing a little search online I have found that you can find multiple different kinds to print off here at Karencookiejar.com. To play the game just give each kid participating a sheet, a pen, and an even amount of clues (after you have removed the actual murders identity, the weapon, and scene of the crime). Let the kids mingle and share clues with one another, but keep things interesting by putting each students name in a bowl and periodically drawing one out, saying that the killer has struck again and the name drawn is now out of the game. To keep some sense of order you can keep kids from over guessing by stating that an incorrect accusation is considered "tampering with the investigation" and will result in "expulsion from the party" (a.k.a. - being removed from the game). Whoever finds out the mystery first gets a prize.

Youth Pastor Confessions

In pattern of being honest in the last few postings, I thought I would continue but turn the attention to the minister rather than the students...


Sometimes I triple check to see if there is anything new on Facebook, Twitter, or my email before I start a task that I know I need to get done. Sometimes I wait to look over a new resource until I need to go to the bathroom, and take it with me as reading material. Sometimes I stay in there so long flipping through stuff my legs fall asleep. Maybe I should stop wasting so much time online.

Sometimes I get annoyed with elderly people visiting the office because they will stop me to chat right when I'm in the middle of a project. Sometimes I will be strategic about when I go make copies because I know the secretary will ask me to help her with a computer related issue. Sometimes I realize that I am a complete stranger to some people and I wonder what they think because I'm never around. Maybe I should be more intentional about being part of the office.

Sometimes I ignore text messages from needy kids that I know but aren't in our youth group.
Sometimes I don't spend time checking up on kids who have missed a few weeks because they aren't "core" students. Sometimes I remember that Jesus has a really big flock, and he cares even about the one. Maybe I should stop acting like an elitist.


What is your confession?

The Middle School Student Office Visit

Yesterday I posted a little insight on middle schoolers. Today I want to shed some light, for those who aren't familiar with these unique individuals, on the way they communicate.

 
A unknown student comes to your office...

STUDENT: (says nothing as they pop their head in and out of your door awkwardly)

YOUTH PASTOR: Hello.

STUDENT: Hi!

YOUTH PASTOR: Can I help you...with something?

STUDENT: Um, my name is Tommy...and my mom said that if I ever had any questions I could come talk to you, and I was wondering...do you play Modern Warcraft 4?

YOUTH PASTOR: Uhh, no I can't say that I do, but...

STUDENT: Because it's awesome and I just got the expansion, and my friend Billy says that if you hit 50,000 XP then you get access to this cool map pack and...

YOUTH PASTOR: Tommy, do you go to the local middle school?

STUDENT: No, I'm home schooled.

YOUTH PASTOR: Yeah, I figured. So do you do many activities then since you can't join any school teams.

STUDENT: No, not really. I do my school work in the morning, and then I play MW4 in the afternoon, unless my mom has to go somewhere, like right now she is at the women's Bible Study down the hall, so she brought me with her. But I tried to tell her that I could stay at home by myself and she could just take my little sister, but she says that I don't need to stay at home all day in front of the computer, but I don't know why she says that because Modern Warcraft isn't a bad game and there isn't a lot of blood or anything, except for this one bad guy at the end of the game who has these bloody bones as part of his costume, but I've already seen him like 4 times, so I'm not scared or anything, and then there...

YOUTH PASTOR: You know, if you aren't doing anything tomorrow night you should come to our Wednesday night youth group, I think you would really like it. There are lots of other kids your age there.

STUDENT: Wednesday nights I can't, I have Boy Scouts.

YOUTH PASTOR: (face palms self) I thought you said you don't do any activities.

STUDENT: No, not school ones, but on Wednesday we go to Scouts, and Sundays are my home school bowling league, and then I also play with my MW4 clan on weekends. It's really cool because we have these two guys from Germany, and...

YOUTH PASTOR: That's is really cool Tommy. Hey, listen, I need to make a phone call real quick. Would you mind maybe stepping out for a minute and coming back a little later.

STUDENT: Yeah, but did anyone ever tell you you look like that guy from Myth Busters?


That is seriously how half of my conversations with random teenagers end. Not kidding, see what I mean below.

 

What are you most interesting conversations with middle school students?

Those Filthy Animals

So last week was our local high school's homecoming football game. Kids painted their bodies, people where dressed in red and gold, and there wasn't a empty seat in the house. Although school spirit was in the air, there was something else that the stadium reminded me of...

You know in the nature shows when all the animals gather together at the watering hole? I swear that is what the concession stand was like. All sorts of people gathered together at a place of consumption, while near by members of a lesser class hid in the shadows. Of course I am talking about the rambunctious sixth graders behind the bleachers.

Yes the high school caste levels are much like the great circle of life, and junior highers are like the hyena's. They are scrawny, they cackle, and many times they smell. They are scavengers in the most literal sense (at the last moment before group ends they will pounce on whatever snacks are left), but you can't blame them for it because the lions (a.k.a.high schoolers) have taken the bigger kill . The kill of course is the social experience.

Too often everything is about the senior highers, and it leaves the younger kids to entertain themselves, which makes them feel like they don't matter. So once in a while dedicate that fat juicy hippo event you have planned to the junior highers instead of the big cats. They will appreciate it and you just may become king of their pack.

5 Social Media Tools You Need to Use!

A few weeks back I did a blog on Internet memes, and how you could use them to further enhance your communication with kids. Well the truth is there are plenty of great resources that are practically begging to be used creatively for ministry, you just have to know about them:

 

Pic Monkey - Don't have the money for a fancy photo shop program? That's fine, because with Pic Monkey you don't need software or even a membership. Just simply visit their website and get cracking with all of their amazing tools for touching up photos, adding cool effects, and putting on text. I have used it to make several flashy advertisements for youth group activities...

Tagzedo - A website (again absolutely free and has no registration) that allows you to make unique word clouds in a matter of minutes. It has tons of options (colors, fonts, shapes) and lets you randomize infinitely if you don't like how it came out. It is really amazing, and using it to artistically display kids names in your youth group makes them feel like you really went out of your way to make some custom art just for them.

 

 

Spotify - If you haven't heard of Spotify, it's like Pandora and iTunes had a baby together. Its great for making your own custom playlists and you can access it from any computer with a Internet connection. It is of great use for throwing together playlists for events (without having to spend any money), but is also good for pulling off a "Name that Tune" sort of game. I have made up a few that you can check out here.

Top Tenz - This is just a website that compiles some pretty nice/funny/useless top ten lists that can actually prove useful should you find yourself needing to make a random time-suck power point to entertain a crowd in between parts of your event, or if you are looking for some good illustrations for a lesson. The website has featured articles on the front page, but also has categories and a search box. Another great aspect is that just about everything listed has a picture or Youtube video linked to it.

Quickmeme - Yeah, yeah. I know this might be redundant, but this is probably the hottest and most relevant tool to teen culture you can use right now. Just like the ones listed above, you can access this website for free and without giving up any personal information to make some fun pictures for whatever reason you like. However, I would suggest that you use a photo snipping/capturing program to get the the best quality photos without a watermark on them after you have made your creation.

 

So there you have it. Five different websites that I highly encourage you to use to sharpen your ministry. If you have any other sites or social media tools that you find useful please let us know in the comment section below.

Movie Trivia Monday Give Away

This weeks give away is probably my most favorite yet. It is a FREE Movie Jeopardy Power Point. The whole game is contained in this one file. There is a main page with various hyper-links to all the different questions, and it looks like the Jeopardy board. It comes complete with six categories and a "Final Jeopardy" round. If you want to change any of the questions up it is fully customizable.

Enjoy!

The Wage of Sin is $3.95

Sin is a lot like coffee.

There are many different kinds, but its all the same.
It's exotic and entoxicating.
Everybody else seems to be partaking in it.
It is dark, essily accessable, and can keep you up all night.
It targets worn down people, and they believe they can't live without it.
We have dedicated places to its worship.
It's the first thing on some peoples minds when they wake up in the moring.
But when it comes down to it, its just plain horrible.

Illustration Abomination

Last week our pastor started off the service with an illustration about his oldest daughter and said, "I can do this because she now lives over a thousand miles away". It got a laugh, but I thought it was pretty indicative of how often pastors' families get put in our weekly talks, especially without their consent.

A few years ago someone showed me the parody music video "Before He Speaks" (a spoof of Carrie Underwood's "Before He Cheats"), and it proves that for some nothing is sacred when it comes to finding a personal example to drop into your presentation.

Well in case you didn't know: Your family is NOT meant to be your exegetical punching bag!

Before I posted my blog last week about "The Look", I had my wife approve it. The month before I wanted to entertain some youth with the story or how my seven year old colored her hair with nail polish, but at the time knew it would have been embarrassing for her so I didn't. I am constantly fighting the urge to throw around some stories about my mother-in-law...

Actually that last part is made up, but the truth is that I draw boundaries with my family and illustrations. They don't need to feel ashamed, or awkward at the fact that people have been privied to their extra-personal information. They need to feel secure and respected, knowing that my relationship with them isn't just another tool for ministry. If you feel like there is a story that is just too valuable to not use, talk with them first and get their permission. If they turn you down, respect it. In the end everyone will be happier.

With that said I need to go finish a lesson about how getting gum stuck in your hair is like being caught up in sin...